Monday, July 16, 2007
Shepard Fairey, Street Artist, Provocateur, Advertising Subversive,
The "war on terror" and the "war" in Iraq and "Homeland Security" and "9/11" and all of the other catchphrases we use in the media and digest like babies are worth deconstructing. We may find that these things have been appropriated for someone else's uses and purposes -- uses and purposes that we don't really want to support.
It is one thing to say it. It is another thing to create something that inspires people to action.
Action. A good word.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Swimming
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Action Figure Art
Missing the ocean
A very flexible girl
Pre-Colonial Folk Art
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Bikini-clad woman pins man with her thighs
read more | digg story
Friday, June 29, 2007
The Corbin Sparrow
Electric Vehicles
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Ryan, Train Hopping Hobo

Ryan has hopped his first train. He met up with a couple of young hobos, and he jumped a freight to get out of Columbus. He was last heading west on said train, but they were discovered and forced off of the train. Now, I'm not sure where he is or what happened. I think he's just fine, though. Read about it here
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Aimless T-Shirts
Monday, June 04, 2007
Ryan, Agenda Pusher
"Thank god your liberal ass is out of our state. Do me a favor, take your paranoid conspiracy driven ass to Cali and stay there. You are a two face person. I thought u were for real but your not, just trying to push your agenda. Oh, stay away from Michigan too. BTW OSU sucks!!!!!!!!!"
He didn't sign his email message to Ryan. He identified himself as 'Deputy Dawg', from Florida. What a moron.
Ryan, in one of his more clever retorts, responded very well, I think. This is a classic Ryanism, I think:
I can't help it if your state is full of total assholes, dude. If you were not one of them, I probably made it very clear that you were not one of them. So if it bothers you that I think assholes are assholes, go ahead and be an asshole about it.
Yeah, I'm trying to push my agenda of doing nice things for people. Clearly that is too difficult for you. (I never claimed to be Jesus, so I'm allowed to talk shit about assholes.)
And use your real name next time, pussy.
So, check out Aimless, if you haven't already, and be looking for Ryan at ComFest this year. It should be great. Maybe you'll see me there, too.
Sunday, June 03, 2007
He's singin' in Korean
read more | digg story
Gig at IndiaOak Pub, Clintonville, June 2, 2007
This was taken at the IndiaOak Pub in Clintonville last night, when I played for about an hour. I opened up for Mike Johnson and his buds, Justin and Edmund. Edmund ran sound most of the evening, and I ran sound a little bit when Mike and Justin were playing. I had a great time. There was a decent turnout for me, thanks to Glen, Nick, Olga, Alex, Yurya, Matt, and Yulia. Mike, Justin, and Edmund also had a decent turnout. I ran into Matt Gill, who co-owns the bar with his brother and who I used to work with. The bartenders were really cool. Hopefully, I didn't embarass myself too much, because it was a fun night.
Setlist:
Just What I Needed - The Cars
Just Like Heaven - The Cure
Grey Street- Dave Matthews Band
In Your Eyes - Peter Gabriel
I Will Follow You Into The Dark - Death Cab For Cutie
Guns Of Brixton - The Clash
What Goes Around Comes Around - Justin Timberlake
Doin' Time - Sublime
The Unforgettable Fire - U2
Another Lonely Day - Ben Harper
Only God Knows Why - Kid Rock
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Maybe I'm out here 2 free U
This one goes like this:
"You R NOT free if U live in fear of a 160-Lb guy w/ a backpack, America. Sadly, that's clearly the prevailing trend. Maybe I'm out here 2 free U."
To me, it sounds like a good song title or album title or book title.
It was about a year ago that I posted one of the first promotions of Aimless. At that time, I wasn't sure that Ryan would actually DO IT, but he did, and I am very happy that he did. It's very inspiring to me to know that he is out there, making his project work.
Thursday, May 31, 2007
What The Maynard - I Play the Piano!
read more | digg story
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Pastor Lew meets Ryan
Ryan has written a lot about our culture, as Lew points out, has become a true student of our culture, or what I would call, an anthropologist. I love it!!!!! I went to school and studied how to become an anthropologist, and Ryan has actually employed himself as an anthropologist. That's very cool, because it inspires me not to throw away my own dreams.
I'm going to have to contact Lew and see how we can work together to help support Ryan with some more marketing and promotions, grassroots-style.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
ArcherPhotos, on Flickr
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Saturday, May 19, 2007
A story about LaKari
LaKari was inspired by a goal of placing anonymous notes, written on post-it note paper, in random places for strangers to find. It is kind of an Amelie, playful, trickster kind of thing to do. It’s kind of adventurous and interesting. I wrote an entry that LaKari read about starting a website that displayed photos of the notes and short entries about the notes, and she started one up! It was really good to feel that I had helped inspire someone to do something fun and cool. So, I’d like to meet LaKari someday. I’m glad that we were able to meet through email, at least.
How to learn to play the guitar
1. Have a good instrument that is in shape, has new strings, and is fun to play, and go to the library to look at their selection of music/guitar books to pick one to start with
2. Learn how to tune the guitar with a guitar tuner or with the pitch from another instrument that is already in tune (piano, pitch pipe, etc.)
3. Learn how to play a fretted note and a bit of basic terminology about music and the guitar (what are ‘frets’? what does ‘up the neck’ mean? what does ‘up pick’ mean? what is ‘down picking’? what is a ‘chord’?...etc)
4. Learn how to play a chord, learn it’s name, learn the notes that make it up, learn other notes on the fretboard
5. Learn how to strum, learn different strum patterns, learn about tempo, learn how to tap your foot to keep time
6. Learn how to strum a couple of chords, learn how to move from chord to chord, learn how to use different strum patterns for the same chords
7. Learn how to play a simple song
8. Learn more songs, chords, rhythms
9. Explore different styles of music
10. Listen to great guitar players
11. Go to watch great guitar players perform
12. Ask questions
13. Seek a good guitar teacher who you like
14. Learn how to sing and play guitar at the same time
15. Write your own music and lyrics
16. Play with others (drummers, bassists, other guitarists, singers, piano players, cello players, violinists… etc)
17. Learn scales and lead patterns
18. Transcribe songs into music
19. Learn as much as you can about harmony and theory
20. Learn how to sight read and read charts
21. Continue learning how to learn and practicing all of the above
- Jay (Docrivs.Com, Blogger, StumbleUpon, MySpace, Flickr, del.icio.us...)
Downtown Columbus Skyline During Storm
Naked Under The Trenchcoat
trenchcoat
Originally uploaded by docrivs.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Retablos, Art of Spanish South America and Central America
I gained a greater appreciation of box retablos during my visits to Santa Fe, New Mexico.
Praying to the sky
I don't recall ever seeing people praying in a restaurant, or saying grace in a restaurant, before the food is eaten. It was strange to me.
Bibliophilia
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Graffiti in Adamastor, Lisboa
The Perfect Bio Photo For A Forensic Scientist or Crime Writer
Friday, May 11, 2007
Moving On To The Land Of Where I Want To Be
We think of life as a line among lines...
Born---->This is what I did when I was 2---->I moved here when I was 5---->I found this when I was 6---->I lost this when I was 8---->I learned about this when I was 10---->I experienced this when I was 11---->I did this when I was 21---->Died
Each person's and thing's history, in this framework, is a series of events that happen at certain points in time, connected by cause and effect at certain pivotal points, all within the framework of the history of reality. Many things occur at the same time, and some of those things are directly related, but we forget that we do not understand what time and space really is.
Some cultures are based on a time, history, and lifestyle in terms of cycles and circles, rather than lines. There really is no beginning. There really is no end. Everything is in constant change and flux.
Tonight, I realized something. The multitudes of lists that I make are not just exercises in worthless distraction. This practice of making lists is how I store and restore ideas. I think that I was born to be a writer.
I've wanted to be so many things: spy, soldier, musician, computer programmer, technician, writer, environmentalist, father, husband, lover, son, brother, adventurer... All of these desires and experiences have helped to create me into who I am. A writer writes. A writer shares experience and knowledge. A writer entertains and informs. I've been practicing to be a writer all of my life, and I've made excuses and excuses to keep myself from the potential for failure and the fear of not having enough money for so long that I feel as if I am experiencing what Neo experienced when he was rescued from the Matrix and brought into Zion.
I've been reading this great book, Writing Down The Bones, by Natalie Goldberg. I've been receiving payment in return for "guitar lessons" from a student who really wants someone to work with as a writing partner. I've been passed over on getting promoted to bartender, or at least it feels that way. I've had little luck in trying to get into the IT field. I've had little luck in trying to save my marriage and many other relationships that appear to have been failing. Now, it's time to take control of the ball.
Although this is a more personal blog post, I am not really revealing the whole of it. The point is that I am undergoing change, as usual, but I am more conscious of that change now.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Art is a good reason to live!!!!
I love music, and I love ART! In anthropology we call this material culture or cultural traditions, depending on if it is “material” (can be touched, physical, an artifact) or not. Music from other parts of the world besides America is great to explore, especially now that the internet and digital music has made it possible to record sounds and spread them around the world in an instant, or an instant of an instant.
docrivs Musician's Profile on Musician's Referral Service at Musician's Institute
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
If you resist change
the state I am in right now and a challenge that I will always face.
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Building a Ger (Yurt)
read more | digg story
Saturday, March 10, 2007
SuicideGirls, by Missy Suicide on Amazon.Com
I'm always interested in how a "way of life" gets marketed and commoditized into a way of life. The SuicideGirls concept, a brand attributed to a company called SG-something, grew from many other past ideas, including Playboy, emo, goth, punk, indie, tattoos, betty page pin-up models, body piercings, skateboarding culture, and all of those "alt-culture" type things that people claim can't be put into a category.
Check out http://www.suicidegirls.com, if you're interested in this community.
link...
tags: [book] [books] [suicidegirls] [suicide_girls] [girls] [pinups] [pin_ups] [pinup_models] [models] [punk] [emo] [goth] [indie] [tattoo] [tattoos] [goth_girls] [punk_rock_girls] [goth_rock_girls] [emo_rock_girls] [body_piercings] [betty_page]
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
A story about Michel Foucault
I read Discipline and Punish about 8 or 9 years ago, after hearing about Michel Foucault in a class I took in university. The class was called “Orwell and Orwellianisms…”, and it, of course, focused on the writings and ideas of George Orwell, one of my heroes.
Where Foucault and Orwell cross is in their examinations of the social concepts of punishment, surveillance, discipline, and crime. Foucault believed that the spectacle of punishment, the fear of being tortured and ripped apart, was not an adequate way to instill discipline in a people and to maintain social control. That’s exactly what Orwell’s 1984 argued, as well. It is only when people internalize an idea that they actually modify their own behavior. The torture must be internalized in order for criminal behavior to be modified, but even then, the motivation can’t be from just fear alone.
Somewhere down the line, Foucault continues, people were place in charge of the decision to keep or free an inmate. Psychologists, Wardens, Parole Officers, Judges, Correctional Officers, Parole Boards, Probation Officers, and other professionals were put in charge of the punished. They make a decision as to whether or not it is in their professional opinion that a criminal has been disciplined and punished enough.
And so, we have 10 to 15, 25 to life, possibility of parole, gun specs, no possibility of parole, good time, bad time, educational credits, and the concept of “rehabilitation”.
Sunday, December 10, 2006
Remembering A Tragedy
Last night, at around 1 AM, someone fired a pump-action shotgun at least 3 or 4 times out in the parking lot of the building where I live. I heard the deep shots, which I did not immediately recognize as gunshots, only I thought that I heard over 2 dozen shots before I looked out the window and watched as some cars sped down the road. I heard no sirens and saw no signs of the police, and hours later, I still had heard no signs of them.
Apparently I wasn't the only one who witnessed that event, because other people in the building reported it to the police and had actually seen it happen. They sent an email out to the rest of us. Understandably, our security, especially where the parking lot is concerned was heavy on our minds.
When an incident like a shooting occurs at night right in the vicinity of where you call home, where you like to go out for the evening, or wherever you feel comfortable, you begin to get the disturbing message that safety and security is a luxury when you live in an unsafe and insecure world.
Anyway, I do remember Dimebag. I do remember how he lived. I do remember how he affected the lives of many people, including myself, purely through his music and ther way that he lived. However, I will also always remember the night that I watched Dimebag, as he lay, dying, on the stage. I will remember the people frantically screaming and running out of the club. I will remember the police officers who ran by me, carrying shotguns and Desert Eagles. I will remember the pop,pop,pop of the gunshots and the final boom of the blast that ended the life of the man who killed all those people.
Though I don't consider myself to be a terrorized person, there is no way that I can honestly say that an event like that can escape my consciousness. And I had been through some very traumatic experiences before that one. I think the fact that the event affected so many people all at once, that really makes it stick in my mind.
Saturday, December 09, 2006
Fatboy Slim - "Weapon of Choice" Video
One of my all-time favorite videos
Friday, December 08, 2006
A story about Opheliaism
She’s cute. She’s smart. She’s into infiltrating abandoned prisons and warehouses. She likes Eddie Izzard. She looks cool with automatic weapons. She knows Beale Street like the back of her hand. She’s a family girl. She is dangerous with a camera.
Thursday, December 07, 2006
Monday, December 04, 2006
Christians protest treatment of holiday season as secular
So, if I am not a Christian and I don't celebrate Jesus's birthday on December 25th, but I take advantage of the traditions of the office being closed, of exchanging gifts, of displaying a tree, of being with family, and of doing any other secular custom (because none of those rituals or customs has anything to do with Jesus) to celebrate the winter solstice (the real reason we celebrat "Christmas" on December 25th), then why would I want to put Christ and Jesus into it?? Are traditionalists and traditionalist/fundamentalist Christians now wanting to use The Law to enforce the practice of their religion in the United States? What are they? The Taliban?!?
They want us to teach Christian beliefs in the guise of science,demanding that science classes give equal teaching treatment to so-called "Creation Science" along with evolutionary theory. They want "God" to remain in the "Pledge of Allegiance" and in all of our American nationalistic anthems. They want references to God and the Bible on our state monuments and in our state institutional structures to remain. They want nativity scenes in the front lawns of the capitol buildings and state houses. They want our country to be a united Christian state and not a democratic, tolerant, federation or republic of states
I don't know if I necessarily want a godless, athiestc, non-spiritual
state/country/nation, but I do want to be able to not have
traditionalist Christians telling me that Christmas is all about Jesus
when it's not
see:
http://de.essortment.com/christmaspagan_rece.htm ;
http://www.irishclans.com/articles/celtchristmas.html ;
http://www.religioustolerance.org/winter_solstice.htm ;
http://www.circlesanctuary.org/pholidays/SolsticeArticle.html ;
http://www.mysteriousbritain.co.uk/festivals/christmas.html ;
http://www.historychannel.com/exhibits/holidays/christmas/trees.html ;
http://www.shambhala.org/arts/fest/unconquered.html ;
http://www.angelfire.com/nj2/jciloa1/origins_of_Christmas.html ;
http://www.christmas.com/pe/1446 ; http://www.tryskelion.com/yule7.htm
; http://greenbelt.com/news/ic9902.htm ;
http://home.sprynet.com/~palermo/solstice.htm ;
http://home.earthlink.net/~fetteroll/kiriena/worldreligions/holidays/pagan/solstice/wintersolstice.html
;
http://italian.about.com/library/weekly/aa120600a.htm ;
http://www.wildideas.net/calyx/library/nihil317.html ;
http://www.circlesanctuary.org/pholidays/SaturnaliaInfo.html ;
http://bibletools.org/index.cfm/fuseaction/Topical.show/RTD/CGG/ID/1143
; http://www.kencollins.com/Holy-02t.htm
Need I put more links? No. Just do a google search on "pagan orgins
christmas solstice". You'll find many, many references to how the
Christians who came long after the time of Jesus Christ used pagan
traditions and customs and beliefs to market their own religion.
Christmas and many other "Christian" holidays are MARKETING SCHEMES.
Christians protest actions that play down Christmas' religious nature
Wed Dec 22, 6:21 AM ET
By Richard Willing, USA TODAY
Julie West is tired of being wished "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry
Christmas." She's annoyed with department stores that use "Season's
Greetings" banners, and with public schools that teach about Hanukkah
and Kwanzaa but won't touch the Nativity story.
So last week, she sent a baked protest to a holiday party at her
first-grade son's school: a chocolate cake with vanilla frosting and
red icing that spelled out "Happy Birthday Jesus."
"Christmas keeps getting downgraded, to the point that you're almost
made to feel weird if you even mention it," says West, a resident of
Edmonds, Wash., who describes herself as a non-denominational
Christian. "What's the matter with recognizing the reason behind the
whole holiday?"
This Christmas season, West has plenty of company. Christians and
traditionalists across the nation, fed up with what they view as the
de-emphasizing of Christmas as a religious holiday, are filing
lawsuits, promoting boycotts and launching campaigns aimed at
restoring references to Christ in seasonal celebrations.
>From New Jersey to California, Christians are moving to counter years
of lawsuits that have made governments wary about putting Nativity
scenes on public property, and that occasionally have led schools to
drop Christmas carols from holiday programs:
• In Bay Harbor Islands, Fla., a Christian sued in federal court after
town officials refused to let her erect a Nativity scene next to a
menorah, or Hanukkah candelabra, on a causeway. Last week, a judge
ordered the town to comply.
• In Maplewood, N.J., parents and students recently petitioned the
local school board after school officials dropped even instrumental
versions of Christmas music from class programs.
• In Denver, a Protestant church responded to the city's decision to
drop "Merry Christmas" from public signs by trying to enter a
Christmas-themed float in the holiday parade. Supporters picketed the
parade and sang Christmas carols after the float was rejected.
• In California, a group called the Committee to Save Merry Christmas
is boycotting Federated Department Stores. The group claims that
Federated's affiliates, including Macy's, prohibit clerks from saying
"Merry Christmas" and ban the word "Christmas" from ads and store
displays. The retail giant says it has no such policy.
Even Kwanzaa, the African-American harvest celebration, has taken a
hit. In Los Angeles, the Rev. Jesse Lee Peterson, a conservative black
activist, has urged black Christians to spurn Kwanzaa, which he calls
a "pagan holiday."
Split over 'Happy Holidays'
The new battles over religion's role in holiday celebrations come more
than two decades after the American Civil Liberties Union (news - web
sites) and other groups began going to court to try to require
municipalities to remove Nativity scenes and other religious displays
from public property. The ACLU argued that such religious symbols
violated the First Amendment's ban on government-endorsed religion.
In two rulings in the 1980s, the U.S. Supreme Court (news - web sites)
said that Nativity scenes are acceptable when they are combined with
other symbols - such as a Santa Claus house - that indicate Christmas
is a secular holiday in American culture as well as a religious one.
Nevertheless, the threat of lawsuits and a desire to be more sensitive
to the nation's growing number of non-Christians - who made up about
18% of the U.S. population in a 2002 survey by Pew Charitable Trusts -
has led many governments, schools and businesses to de-emphasize
Christ in Christmastime celebrations. Phrases such as "Happy Holidays"
and "Season's Greetings" have replaced "Merry Christmas" at many
public venues.
In a new CNN/USA TODAY/Gallup Poll, 44% of Americans surveyed said the
trend toward "Happy Holidays" is a change for the better, and 43% said
it wasn't. Only 11%, however, said they avoid saying "Merry Christmas"
out of fear of offending someone.
Carol Sanger, spokeswoman for Federated Department Stores, says
Federated employees use phrases such as "Season's Greetings" and
"Happy Holidays" interchangeably with "Merry Christmas" in order to be
"more reflective of the multicultural society in which we live."
She says the chain aims to "embrace all" the religious and secular
holidays that occur in November and December.
"If you were Druid, I'd be wishing you a 'Scintillating Solstice,' "
Sanger says.
John Whitehead, director of the Rutherford Institute, a group in
Charlottesville, Va., that defends against challenges to speech and
religion rights, says the recent trend has been for schools and
municipalities to excise "all mention of Christmas, out of some
misshapen idea that this respects diversity."
He is particularly critical of decisions such as that made by the
school board in Maplewood, N.J., which decided to drop traditional
carols and other Christmas music from public school programs during
the mid-1990s after receiving several complaints.
This year, the ban was extended even to instrumental versions of
Christmas songs.
Board President Brian O'Leary said in a statement that playing songs
that "focus on religious holidays ... could become an opportunity not
to learn about a religious holiday or tradition, but to celebrate it."
Bans are 'misplaced'
Charles Haynes, senior scholar at the First Amendment Center in
Arlington, Va., says that such bans are "rare" and "misplaced."
Court decisions, Haynes says, permit public school students to study
religion and to perform religious music as part of the curriculum,
provided that religious practices are not endorsed.
Whitehead says that overly cautious approaches to mentioning Christ in
Christmas celebrations has meant that "in the name of offending no
one, you now have high school kids who can't play music that's part of
the culture, and store clerks who are afraid to say, 'Merry
Christmas.' It takes a joyous and merry day and just makes it blah."
Sandra Snowden agrees. According to papers she filed in a federal
lawsuit, the resident of Bay Harbor Islands, Fla., was "offended" that
the town allowed a menorah, but not a Nativity scene, to be placed
along a public causeway.
When she protested, court papers say, town leaders countered that the
menorah, which commemorates the rededication of the Temple in
Jerusalem after a Jewish military victory in 165 B.C., was a secular
symbol of freedom.
Before a federal judge ruled in her favor, Snowden rejected the town's
offer to install a Christmas tree rather than a Nativity scene, which
the town officials had called "divisive."
Those seeking to put more Christ into Christmas have had other successes.
In Mustang, Okla. on Dec. 14, parents incensed that a Nativity
sequence had been dropped from a school holiday program organized to
help defeat an $11 million school bond referendum.
And in Washington state, cake maker Julie West is claiming a small victory.
Although her son's teacher expressed some misgivings, West served
slices of her "Happy Birthday Jesus" cake to 20 first-graders and
about five other parents. No one complained, she says.
"I had gotten a legal opinion from the Rutherford Institute saying I
was within my rights before I brought the cake to school," West says.
"That's Christmas this year, I guess: candy cane frosting and a legal
opinion."
Friday, December 01, 2006
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Napalm Death - Nazi Punks Fuck Off
They played this at the show at the Alrosa, November 15, 2004. They were awesome.
Sunday, November 26, 2006
Splatter movie... in a flash!
If you haven't already, you should check out The Texas Chainsaw Massacre in 30 seconds with bunnies, because, if you don't, then you might see the whole movie and take it much too seriously.
It's possible : )
Ryan's on the road
Saturday, November 25, 2006
Action Squad Missions - Urban Ruins
Enjoy.
"Creepers" - James Michael Tyler, "Book Look", An Interview With David Morell
Have you ever seen the movie, <i>C.H.U.D.</i> It was an almost B-grade
horror movie that came out in the 80's. There were these cannibals
that developed/evolved due to genetic mutation caused by contaminated
sewage waste. These mutants lived in the sewers underneath the city --
New York, I think.
Or, have you read the Stephen King novel, <i>It</i>? In that novel
there was a murderous, supernatural creature that appeared as a
kid-killing clown.
These terrifying images often haunted my mind during my high school
years, but that only enhanced the thrill I felt from exploring old
places that had been abandoned and were off-limits for
exploration-bound kids.
Recently, I was introduced to an interesting underground culture,
called "urban exploration", by an enthusiast of the movement.
The <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urban_exploration">urban
exploration</a> culture is made up of people who explore abandoned
buildings, like prisons, missile silos, bunkers, asylums, sanitoriums,
hospitals, schools, hotels, grain elevators, and factories. They are
often history buffs and architecture and urban archaeology
enthusiasts, who record their infiltrations with digital cameras or
videocameras. They share their stories and images on web forums,
lists, and websites, like <a href="http://uer.ca">Urban Explorer
Resources</a>, and they film documentaries, like <a
href="http://www.urbanexplorersfilm.com/"><i>Urban Explorers</i></a>.
You can view the <a
href="http://www.urbanexplorersfilm.com/trailers.htm">trailer</a> to
get a good glimpse of the mindset of some urban explorers.
The novel, "<a href="http://creepers.feoamante.net/Creepers/Past.html">Creepers</a>",
by David Morell, is a horror/thriller novel about urban explorers who
explore the fictitious <a
href="http://www.theparagonhotel.com/">Paragon Hotel</a> and
experience some terrifying adventures while doing so.
Below, is a video clip I found on <a
href="http://www.youtube.com/v/uBGhe0Ptirc">YouTube</a> that
introduces the story. Enjoy,
<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie"
value="http://www.youtube.com/v/uBGhe0Ptirc"></param><param
name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed
src="http://www.youtube.com/v/uBGhe0Ptirc"
type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425"
height="350"></embed></object>
Yes, my friends... Bread is the real enemy here.
!!! BREAD IS DANGEROUS !!!
1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users.
2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.
3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever, and influenza ravaged whole nations.
4. More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.
5. Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average American eats more bread than that in one month!
6. Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low incidence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease, and osteoporosis.
7. Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after as little as two days.
8. Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to "harder" items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter, and even cold cuts.
9. Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 90 percent water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy, gooey bread-pudding person.
10. Newborn babies can choke on bread.
11. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400 degrees Fahrenheit! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.
12. Most American bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.
In light of these frightening statistics, it has been proposed that the following bread restrictions be made:
1. No sale of bread to minors.
2. A nationwide "Just Say No To Toast" campaign, complete celebrity TV spots and bumper stickers.
3. A 300 percent federal tax on all bread to pay for all the societal ills we might associate with bread.
4. No animal or human images, nor any primary colors (which may appeal to children) may be used to promote bread usage.
5. The establishment of "Bread-free" zones around schools.
This article was written by B.S. Wheatberry in a desert after consuming mass quantities of yeast bread then realizing his canteen was empty. (seriously :P )
Why Can't I Own a Canadian?
Why Can't I Own a Canadian?October 2002Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative: Dear Dr. Laura: Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them: When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them? I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her? I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians? I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself? A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here? Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die? I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves? My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14) I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging. Your devoted fan, |
| Free 3-Month Subscription to Utah Humanist Home | Site Map | Meetings Info | Historical Humanists | Book Recommendations Humanists of Utah, an incorporated Utah non-profit corporation, has a mission to promote the principles of |
oldbooks
Books
























